You didn’t notice

I feel almost invisible when attending school. As if nobody notices me. I sit alone in my own world. Wondering if anybody would care to be friends with me. Everyone passes by me like nothing. I could be breaking down, and all they would do is pass by.. These tears were streaming down because I was alone. I’d walk into school and feel miserable. I would always think I’d come to school and I would have friends. But people started to notice. I became the weird girl. They would call me names now. I wanted to be invisible now, I wanted to stay in the shadows. Days went by then months. It got much worst and soon I was known as the girl who would cut herself. I went into a severe depression. I stopped going to school, online schooling was the only opportunity. I came back the following year and eyes seemed to follow me everywhere. Enchanted laughter was everywhere. Everything seemed to be a blur, it was my nightmare. It wasn’t till the middle of the first semester when it started. The boys would push me around, and tell me that I was a mere waste. It got to me.. I couldn’t bare this. But I kept it to myself anyways. Wiping my tears away and telling my mother my day was fine. Blinded, getting verbally bullied wasn’t enough to satisfy them. They were hungry for fire. It gave them the power to look down on me. My heart really did hurt one day. I felt as if were going to burst right out my chest and explode the red crimson fluid everyday.. I fell on the ground. I was now on the ground and they continued to laugh. As the crowd surrounded me their laughter continued to repeat in my head. I was losing myself. Panicking.. Screaming for help a teacher finally came to break the crowd. Blood started to surface my mouth and I felt myself drowning. Rushed to the hospital, they told me I could have died.. and I thought it wouldn’t have been so bad. I would have been free from misery, the pain in my chest still remained. I didn’t do anything to deserve this. I was a quiet person who wanted to be noticed.. Have friends, someone I can share these thoughts, my problems too. I wished so hard.. no one came. I realized I was alone. Alone for awhile. Maybe forever. Nothing is possible is what I heard. It could be unexpected for all I know. Maybe this is what they want. They want me to end my life. Nobody deserves to die. But it’s what we make of life. Living it to the fullest. My life didn’t start, instead I stopped it. With one blow the heart. I faded and disappeared into the shadows.. where I once belonged.

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