You can leave your hat on

We have all heard the expression “She wears many hats.”  this could not be more true than in a relationship.  We do not have to be in a D/s or BDSM oriented relationship to balance many hats.

So many seem to believe if you are submissive  your life consists of lounging around all day waiting on your Superior Being to return from a long day of slaying dragons, whisks you into his arms.  Shortly after you retire to Master’s chambers where he will delicately flog you with the softest of all floggers until you weep softly drifting into subspace and fall asleep cradled in his tender arms until the morning comes and he has to return to his quest of keeping the kingdom safe from dragons and other unwanted varmint.


I know there are relationships that allow for the submissive creature to stay home and tend to her Master’s every whim, this does not mean that is the only thing that submissive does.  We all wear many hats daily and we all have to find a way to balance those hats.

I am a mother first and foremost, I am responsible for my children and their well being.  Under the Mom hat I am an educator, I am a nurse, I am a taxi, I am the disciplinarian, I am Mother…

I am a wife. I am responsible for managing my household, paying the bills, feeding my family, purchases, scheduling again I play taxi, I am the alarm clock, I am Wife…

I work outside the house, I am a supervisor, I am a coworker I am career woman…

I have many other hats, I am a sister, I am a daughter, I am an aunt, I am a friend and this list goes on and on.

I am submissive, I am His. I have to find a way to balance all of these hats and please him.  His whip is not silk it hurts, he does not slay dragons, he comes home from work tired and cranky. Under my submissive hat I am expected to accommodate all of my other hats and still find time to make my Superior Being the center of my universe.

I am human, this is the common hat of every individual on the planet.  Under this hat we all need to remember, some days are just no good.  I find myself waking up at times thinking “Oh no I have to do this”.  Keep in mind you will experience a shift in wind that may take a hat off leaving another hat as your umbrella in the storm.  We will all have bad days.  Superior Beings have bad days, submissive creatures have times when all they need is for that Superior Being to smile at them and say “We will make it through this.” Submissive beings remember to whisper those words to your Dominant as well.  For all the hats we jungle as a submissive our Superior Being is wearing a matching hat.  In addition to our matching hats our Superior Beings often feel the need to be responsible for everything in every situation.  They feel it is their responsibility to care for family, friends, and yes you as their submissive.  Superior Beings carry a burden we as submissive creatures will never carry and that is the fact that in addition to balancing the hats they are doing this on the pedestal we place them on.  They are expected to always be perfectly in control and will push themselves harder than any submissive I have met including myself out of fear of letting us see a chink in the armor, after all how can they expect us to trust them to slay the evil dragon if thy are not wearing the proper hat right?

With all of this being said it is equally important for both Superior Beings and submissive creatures to remember, the hat you are wearing does not dictate who you are.  You may be wearing the mother hat, the sister hat or even the dragon slayers hat and do not be surprised if that hat changes several times daily.  One thing to keep in mind is regardless of the hat I wear, when all is said and done, I have to be able to live with me.  When I look in the mirror, I have to like the person looking back even if she is wearing a different hat than I expected.

I know we all like to believe we eat, sleep and breathe our Superior Beings, but when you put on your sleeping hat at night the only person you truly have to be able to sleep with is yourself.  If you are happy with yourself it does not matter which hat you put on it will work splendidly with any outfit!

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