The Middle: Michelle, Mike, and a few other things.

A little before I moved into my other pap’s house my cousin Shawn had come up and brought his new girlfriend Michelle. She was nice at first actually and he informed me that they were moving up to Renovo. Which is where I lived at the time. Anyway that was exciting news to me. My cousin and I had gotten really close over the time that my Grandfather was passing. Anyway, when they moved up it was wonderful. We were together all the time. Michelle was nice too but that all changed. She turned out to be Wiccan. Which is fine with me. Hell I was all kinds of into it. I didnt know much about it honestly but I was willing to learn. I started learning a little here and there and I got my friend Tiff into it as well. Through our training things started to get a little weird. Michelle would say that she knew us in a past life and all this bull shit. However I let it go for a while.  A little while later I got a boyfriend. Which was nice because I wasn’t really myself after my pap had passed away. I dont think anyone really is. I was numb. Emotionless honestly and I just let everyone walk all over me because I didnt give a shit. Anyway at first the relationship was nice. I had him meet Michelle and Shawn. At the time Mike was on probation and had to do hours and all that good stuff. Well Shawn was working for the burrow and said that he could do the hours with him. Mike came over a lot because of that and got closer with Michelle and Shawn. A little too close with Michelle but of course I let it go. It was whatever so long as he was mine and mine only. Well a little after everyone hung out with each other Mike got a little weird. Different. He would call me names and if I didnt do something he asked he would throw me around like a rag doll. I let it go because I had someone. I thought it would stop. Yes that’s how stupid I was. I just wanted someone there to take the pain away from my pap because I am never the one to show emotions. It ate me up inside because honestly I never told my pap that I loved him. I was afraid to love people then because of certain things. Anyway before Mike and I had gotten together I was hanging out with my best friend Phillip. Our relationship was always complicated. That night we kissed and Mike found out about it and even though we werent together at this time and even though Mike had someone at this time he got pissed. Took my phone and got his number. Threated him which caused Phillip to back away from me. Mike told me I wasn’t allowed to talk to Phillip again and I agreed to it because hey as long as I had someone to take the pain I felt away who the hell cared. Granted I still talked to Phillip anyway but whatever. Mike’s abuse got worse however. He would still throw me around and call me horrible things and all that. He had a bad home life and when he turned 18 he moved out of his mom’s house and into Shawn and Michelle’s. Again I knew something was going on with him and Michelle. Shawn knew it and acted on it. He left her and moved out. A part of me didn’t want to accept that Mike would do that to me. I let it go and thought nothing more on the subject. Not long after Shawn moved out I was up at my friend Kyrah’s. I was staying there for a little bit. My mom had come up to the house crying telling me to sit down. I again am not good with emotions and what not. My sadness gets turned to anger because I refuse to cry in front of someone. Ill hold it in until I cant anymore. Anyway she told me that Bubba was hit by Donny. He ran him over in the truck by “accident” . He was alive and was going to the vet. I didnt know what to do. That was the only thing I had left of my pap and actually I couldnt even have him because my nana refused to give him to me despite what my pap had wanted. Anyway…I went to tell Mike and he blew me off. I was hurt and upset…how could my boyfriend who said he loved me and would be there for me just blow me off? My dad always knew what was going on between Michelle and him and had confronted him in the store parking lot. A huge fight went down however it was only verbal because well I made sure of it. A few days after that I was in school when I got the news that Bubba was put down. I turned my sadness into anger. I blamed Donny for killing my dog because well he was just that type of man. In the meantime I had those thoughts and was in the art room. There was this girl named Larissa who was…well there are really no good words to describe this girl. She was just something else. A week before she had tried taking a tongue ring from my other best friend Angela. She had just cleaned it. Mind you Larissa dont even have her tongue pierced so its beyond me why she wanted something so bad that she wanted to steal it. However Angela had caught her doing it and called her out on it. So back in the art room she was talking about how everyone was talking about her and she apparently couldnt figure out why her stupid ass was being talked about. Well I was talking to a girl in the class about her art when I turned to look for Kyrah. I made eye contact with Larissa instead and she accused me of talking about her. Seriously if I had anything to say about her I would have told her. I couldnt care less about the damn drama that goes on in this girls life. Which I told her. She let it go at the moment and the bell rang. I went to my locker and was telling Angela about Bubba when Larissa came around and got in my face about talking about her to Angela. So I told her to back off and she slapped me. I beat the shit out of her and got suspended. I had to leave school early and Mike came to pick me up because my mom was down the road. I told him about it and he told me that I was nothing but a little bitch. She was an easy fight and all this other shit. I let it go. I had enough problems that day I didnt care. Well we got up to his and Michelle’s house. Michelle was at work. Well anyway I went back into the bathroom to get away from Mike for a little bit but I noticed that his things were in Michelle’s room. When I asked him about it he got pissed. Pinned me to the wall and yelled in my face. When I pushed him away from me he slapped me across the face and that last slap snapped me out of everything. I beat him up for every time he threw me around. For everything he ever said bad about me and my family I was done. I grabbed my shit and walked to town so I could be at Kyrah’s instead. After that I broke up with Mike and never got back with him again. I went to court a few days after that and won. By this time we lived with my other pap. We had Me, mom, dad, pap, my aunt, and my little cousin living under the same roof. It was hard at first. My pap really wanted nothing to do with me because I wasnt his ideal thought of a granddaughter. I’m not a girly girl. I wear black and studs. Leather and what not. I’m not religious at all and my pap was. Well everything got too much for my pap after the fight I had with my friend Ambrena. I thought I would have to go to court again. I didnt. However my pap moved out and three more people moved in. Now it was mom, dad, my aunt, my little cousin, Talya, Taylor, Tanner, and then me. One night my aunt and dad got into a fight and she pushed him. My dad had just gotten back surgery because he got into a wreck a long long time ago and he was never the same after that. If he would have fallen he would have been very very hurt and it wouldnt be 100% that he would be able to walk again. Good thing I caught him. My dad didnt hurt her…all he did was lead her outside and push her onto the couch. My aunt left and called the muskers (cops). We got kicked out once more with no where to go. We finally found a place and that was that. Talya and Taylor didnt work out and just left without saying anything. Now I live with my parents and a crazy old lady who sees things and snorts pills. However she is moving out soon and hopefully my friend Devin is moving in. That’s all for now.

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