A Vampire’s True Fate

I was born dead, I think it was fate, that I became this monster. That this darkness eat my heart away….that the self I know to be me, turn to dust and my memories to a puzzle. Becoming random unsteady… I have only what you give me, only what you will me to have. I want more. I always want more. More this thirst within me, more this hunger, more this desire to lay you down and pass inside you to no end. I want to no end. I long for everything. See I thought by becoming a vampire, my longing would end, but I am with even more longing. I have freedom, but there is no where I have not been. I have a painless life, but a boring one. I have you here, but I can not feel you here. I have eyes, but tears will never flow from them. So many things I can not do. So many still fearful of us…. I feel everything too much, so much, so fast. I hear everything that lives. I hear the heart of this world beating, while I stand still. I run the water on my face, trying to take in it. I can’t keep you here, I told the light that shines on me, and for a small moment it tries to show the face of who I was before…Too many thoughts. I am so awake….Come to me I call to her…then I call to anyone who will hear…come to me. Let us take to the night a beautiful song. You and I, hush now, lay down let me take you in for a moment…..let everything stop..no sound….I sometimes long to feel lost as I did before…Now I have my way, I am lost no more….but I ever watch everything change as I stay just the same….I grow restless of this…always on the other side of that window looking out to a light I can not touch. It is true when they call us monsters…for I see what I have become. What my thoughts are, what my actions can be…you never sleep..it never happens…there is not a rest for us. We move, we go on and on…I look up and days have passed me by. I did not even feel the time go by. Our truth is that there is more pain for ones like us, then for any other…. I could run, but I would only be running from myself shadows. You can not change fate.

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