19 years


My last Journal was short and lame, Im sorry. 

I don’t think anyone will read this, its not like anyone cares. But I like putting it public so people know that I am not ashamed of what has happened to me. 

Im going to write out my life (19 years)

  1. Adopted (Abandoned) 
  2. Sister born, Mom focuses all attention on her
  3. Dad becomes abusive and broke my wrist
  4. Preschool Bullied
  5. Start trying to get attention from parents
  6. Blurry memories of kindergarten (good year) 
  7. Rivalry with sister begins/ start seeing therapist
  8. Bullying continues and develop eating disorder
  9. Sexually assaulted by the electrical man at home
  10. Hospitalized and diagnosed with anxiety and depression
  11. Start lying more to friends for attention and approval
  12. Start acting fake and developing crushes 
  13. Had first crush and was rejected (not good enough– as always) 
  14. Started seeing nutritionist
  15. Graduated middle school started high school and changed myself, started wearing sluttier clothes, and was involved in a youth group, i was raped, and then met my first love, hospitalized, switched schools 4x, lied, wanted love.
  16. Drugs, didn’t eat, alcohol. Sent away to treatment.
  17. in treatment
  18. in treatment and graduated mid year. relapsed. got back with rapist, got back with first love, met N, had sex with 7 guys, met b, MET MY BIRTHMOM<3, started to find myself
  19. in love with ben and pregnant and going to school and have a job

Life is turning around!

Pregnancy was a surprise… but … thankful

2 thoughts on “19 years”

  1. I read it, and I’m glad I did. You met your birth mom!! Clearly that was a turning point for you. And you are going to be a mom yourself now—-Bless your heart, congratulations on the baby on the way. I’m so glad life is turning around for you. Keep the faith!

  2. Oh some of us have one hellova story,huh?
    Enjoyed yours…
    Being a mother is amazing

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