Tired

I think I only got about 3 or 4 hours of sleep last night.  It wasn’t because of something good either.  Anthony is done.  I guess he should have been gone a long time ago but my masochist side wanted to keep him around.  Last night he said I should come over so I mistakenly got ready and then texted him and he never texted back.  He didn’t fall asleep either because he had just gotten up from a nap.   This is the second time he’s blatantly ignored my text and last time he’s ever going to do that.  I know we weren’t even dating or anything but it’s common decency to reply to a text even if he had another bitch come over last night he could have made up an excuse.  Even if he is just a fwb, there’s no excuse for being rude.  I’m out.  It seems like ever since my breakup things with guys have gotten worse and worse.  Maybe it’s just karma.  But I’m tired.  I’m physically, mentally, and emotionally tired and there’s nothing anyone or anything can do to help me.  I have to get my ass out of bed and do something to change this stupid trajectory my life is in.  I spent my past two days off in bed watching Netflix.  One day would have been fine but two days is a bit much.  It’s time for my pity party to stop and for me to get my ass in gear to change things.  I don’t know where I’m going to start but I just know I need to start.  At least I have work today so I’ll be doing something.  I just hope I don’t fall asleep…

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