Lonely and Horny (Rated R Diary)

 I want to start that I have been seeing this guy since February. Which I only saw him 2 and saw him again in May. I’m doing my best to stick to this guy instead of fucking around with others.  The more I see this guy “J”, the more cold his is like whenever we finish fucking he tells me to leave because he has to “sleep”. I’m glad we do it in the dark because if not, he would had see me in tears and I wish I wouldn’t feel that way. I constantly think of texting him and to tell him I’m horny but I know that I will only get 20-30 mins and its not really enough for me. I wish that he would be in the mood for cuddling and having more than one round of fucking. It’s funny how in texting he seems more friendly than in person and what makes me sad is that I feel cheap, used but its what I basically ask for. Just for a NSA thing, so I guess its supposed to be that way and I only doing it because I want to be distracted from the guy I’m in “love” with who he finally fell in love with this chick he met online. You have no idea that when he confess his true love to me after 3 years of not wanting to know, a part of me died instantly. I know I should stop seeing this guy but I want sex. I don’t want to fuck with other bunch of guys online. Oh fuck my life for now

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