I’ve been dating Arthur for 3 months. It’s been amazing! I smile all the time, haha. But something is actually bothering me a lot. People always say that when you start dating someone, you become a magnet for single people to hit on you. I see that’s true. Why do people do that? It’s even worse when the person knows you’re not available and decides to flirt with you anyway. And what do you do when this person is one of your best friends?
Two weeks ago, my family and I went to Ubu. It was carnaval, so we decided to go there and spend some time together. My friend Mayara was coming that weekend. She and I used to hate each other when we were kids, but we were friends. My dad used to be a pastor at her church. After he left, we lost touch. We met again on my birthday in 2014 and we became really good friends. GOOD friends, lol. We dated for a while, but then we broke up because we fought a lot. We decided to be just friends. We became best friends, actually. Anyway, she’s been very needy these days. We went to the beach everyday when we were in Ubu. When we were swimming, she was always touching me and hugging me. One time, we were talking and then she tried to kiss me. I told her to stop that (she was kidding, but then she said she was really needy) and reminded her I had a boyfriend. She said she was sorry and that she wasn’t being herself. I said it was okay and I told her not to worry about that. The next day, we went to the beach again and she kept hugging me when we were swimming and this time I got really horny. She was on my lap. She gave me a little peck on the lips and then I got upset and told her to stay away. I don’t like that attitude. I DON’T CHEAT and I wanted her to respect that. I felt really bad for getting horny and she felt bad for doing that. She apologized to me later and told me she wasn’t gonna do that again. After that, everything was okay, we all had a great time and then we came back home.
A week later, my ex-Sunday morning class teacher (from church) sent me a message on Whats App and asked me why I wasn’t going to the services anymore. He told me he started going back to church some weeks before and didn’t see me there (he was taking a course and it was hard for him to go to church every Sunday…he’s a police officer), so he asked my friend where I was and my friend told him I stopped going to church. I told him that was true and that I don’t believe in many things church preaches everyday. He asked me if I wanted to go running on the beach the next day, so we could talk more. I agreed and we did that. I told him everything and he was shocked. I said I was doing pretty well and that I had never felt so free and confident. After that, he opened up to me and he told me he was struggling with his marriage. His wife is a pain in the ass (he didn’t say that…I’m saying that because I know her). She has a very bad temper and they’re always arguing. He told me he started cheating on her and going on dates with girls he met online…Tinder. Then he told me he started going out with guys too and had sex with some of them. Now I was shocked. I said I couldn’t judge anyone, but that I thought he should be honest with his wife…that if he wasn’t happy with his marriage, he should get divorced. He said he didn’t know what to do. He got married too young and he saw how much he’s missed. He’s 41, but he doesn’t even look like a 41 year old. When I first met him, I thought he was 25/26…because he looks very young. He’s a good looking guy, he has green eyes, a nice hair, a good body and he says things that a 25 year old would say. He’s also one of the nicest people I’ve ever met. When we were going back to our houses, he looked at me in a different way…like he was into me. I pretended I hadn’t noticed anything and then we said goodbye. He started texting me everyday and he keeps saying we should hang out more. He wants to go running on the beach everyday and wants me to run with him. I’m kinda scared. He’s married and he wants to have a fling with me. Why? Seriously…why? I always admired him and told him he was one of the coolest people I had ever met. But now he disappointed me. I told Arthur what was going on and he told me that’s what happens when people get married too fast. That’s what happened to them. They got married really fast and too young. That’s really sad.