Confessions of a Risin’ Star

(Above Pic: my second muse)

I spoke to myself this afternoon about how last week, it was throbbing aching from a variety of sources. It was so bad, I briefly considered…escapism. This week (s0 far) it has been the insanity of my religiously flawed parents. (Their reality is flawed, and as it exudes, they are becoming more unhinged, moment by moment. This is likely the case for anyone who succeeds religion over trill.) 😉

A lot of good has happened. Because of my trust issues, and how shady people have proven to be (including anyone who circumferences me long enough), I won’t speak too much on it. Acheiving comes by way of tests and strengthening… So, let’s just say, I’m of an industry that’s not made for weak souls…:)

My mother, (who I know for a larger portion of my life than I should have allowed) has been a definite portrait of who women are to men like me: tests. She (like I presume all to most women) pokes and prods. She’s gotten a taste of who I am, and it all seems so very unnecessary. Still, it’s been repeatedly lately. Such comes on the heels of evading some truly serious s***. So, at some point, I have to tell myself: this is life…

I refuse to go the gay route(despite the many men coming on to me lately). I feel like society is somehow wielding some that way…

I don’t knock anyone for their choice. I mean, how can you? It’s their choice; however, I’ve noticed how antagonistic people can get nowadays, if you don’t agree with their choice. That is why I don’t say much about how I feel in public. Still, truth be told, I feel like homosexuality modes against the true poles of nature. For me, I don’t have to pretend to be a man. It’s in me. It’s who I am. Of course, there are those and that who seek to stifle that, but at the end of day, I’m me. When you go through enough, you settle into that. Settling into that, frees you…

I have these moments where I noticed the truth in those life has pulled me away from. I dunno…I kinda fee like I’m in a crazy carnival ride into an uncertainness of nowhere. You still have to remind yourself that, it’s a choice we make, deeply and redundantly…

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