It’s been a total of 10 days since I have been fired. Saying that word makes me cringe. It makes me want to take a brick and break a fucking a window. A lot of windows. That requires a lot of bricks. Bet it’s a good stress reliever.
10 fucking days.
I was there happy as shit because I knew it was Friday and in three days I was taking off to the Dominican Republic with my fiancé. Life was perfect before that Friday. I just started a new job and finally left behind the food industry. I no longer reeked of grease. I began to let my hair down and finally be a woman who was ecstatic to start a new path in life. New clothes, new look, I was so ready for the opportunity that I actually forgot to take my son to see the Easter Bunny back in April. Yes, I felt like I was on cloud 9. Nothing and nobody was able to bring down my happiness.
Except that Friday morning.
I turned around in my computer chair and noticed she was standing over me with a big smile on her face. Confused, I smiled nervously back. She asked me to come in her office and before I knew it she ripped everything from under me. The path I chose, the steady job I had quit for this new challenge, my families income decreasing by 50%, my goals and my happiness were completely shattering right in front of me.
As the words settled in I could not help but cry. I didn’t know what else to do. I could not speak; I was so confused. I was speechless til the moment I left the office. I gathered my belongings and took the walk of shame. I must have stayed in my car for three hours waiting for my fiancé to arrive from school. As soon as I saw him he wrapped his arms around me.
I have not gotten over it yet. I have never been let go from a job before so this is a new experience and hopefully it will not happen again. I’m still shocked that 10 days ago I was employed and doing the whole working mom role. Now I’m just sitting here on my couch wondering when will I have my true calling?
Where are those bricks…
Everything happens for a reason. I hope I find mine at the end of the tunnel because I’m reaching my 30’s and feeling like a major loser.