Break, but not us

Caved and got one of these. Sucks that Xanga got so weird and erased all of my posts. That journal probably had posts since 2007; that’s a lot of gossip and venting.

Anyway, I wanted to take note of this weird feeling I’m having. Waking up next to him this morning, and falling asleep by myself tonight just feels too weird. It’s crazy, even though officially it’s only been 2 months for us together, I’ve been sleeping next to him since August. There’s nothing I hate more than sleeping alone. But, this empty bed will have to do for another week.

Thanksgiving break is great. I love my family. They’re so supportive and we’re truly blessed. But, deep down, I miss him like crazy. There’s never a moment he doesn’t cross my mind. Honestly, I get worried about breaks from seeing him because of my jealousy. However, the other day was our 2nd month anniversary (11/21/13) and he wrote me the sweetest note. He was saying he hoped he could “keep earning my trust,” and for me to know that he would “never do anything” to hurt me. He also said that our fights are what he hates the most, but that “what we have right now is so good nothing can break us apart.” This boy is just amazing. I’m really learning to trust him with each day, and maybe this break will be a true test that he will pass this time.

I remember us talking about the 4 letter word. “I’ve wanted to say it so many times,” he told me. I can’t stop thinking about that moment while we’re apart right now. There’s something really special about this kid. I know it’s going to be an amazing ride (not the dirty kind lol).

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