Rock Bottom.

You would think I’d be used to feeling this low.

My sister and I got into a huge fight. It started off as a typical fight, however it escalated massively and now, I’m pretty sure I’m dead to her.

She knows that I’m not a virgin. However our mother did not. The topic came up and my sister threw me under the bus telling me to tell Mom the truth. This pissed me off because that’s not how I’d like for my mother to find out. Then, she proceeded to call me a slut. She might have meant it as a joke, I don’t really know. I do know that I’m sensitive so whatever the reasoning behind it, I got upset. I went to my room, stressed already from her visit. I locked my door and wouldn’t allow anyone in with me. Eventually my brother in law needed to hand me something. Following him came my sister. She shoved her way into my room. I was crying already because of my strong anxiety problems. I yelled at her to get out and leave me alone. She wouldn’t leave. Somehow I ended up in the bathroom.

I was waiting for her to exit my bedroom so I could be alone. Everything goes quiet and I walk back to my room. Then, my mom is asking me why I allowed my boyfriend to call my sister a whore. I start screaming because in that instant I knew that she had went through my phone while I wasn’t in the room.

While being upset I texted my boyfriend and yes I did bitch and complain and call her disrespectful.

In his message he said something along the lines of, “she had a kid at 18 and lives off of someone who makes shit money. Why the fuck is she on your case? That makes her a whore.”

What she doesn’t know is when my boyfriend uses that term he means stupid. As if you’re calling someone retarded (however that is negative). She came in my room crying and screaming that I shit talk about her and allow him to call her a whore.

To be honest, in my rant I don’t even think I noticed his message. But either way, even my mom said everything in the text was true. I feel super guilty about breaking my sister’s trust. But she broke mine as well.

She also had her three children write me hate letters before she stormed off. Now, keep in mind this is a thirty-three year old woman.

After she left I went into a major anxiety attack, unable to walk or use my hands. Hell, my face was numb. Talking was difficult. I laid in my floor and cried until my medicine too effect.

I still have the smell of tears in my nose and my body aches from the severity of my anxiety attack.

My sister has yet to speak to me.

2 thoughts on “Rock Bottom.”

  1. Anastasiaperez, I hope I am not intruding. But I don’t think you did anything wrong. I would have been mad, too. My mother went through my room many times without me knowing. My sister eventually told me about it because she would gossip about what’s in my room (I have tons of make up, I don’t hang my clothes, etc). I am still mad at her to this date, mainly because she wouldn’t admit it and yelled at me when I confronted her. So, I know how it’s like when someone doesn’t respect your privacy, and how awful it is to be in a fight with someone in your family.

    I think your sister’s response was very immature, especially having children write hate letters. It’s even worse that you are their aunt. Since you don’t live with her, I think you shouldn’t think of it any more. At least not now. Hope you are already feeling better by the time you get to read this.

  2. Thank you very much. <3 Your comment was much appreciated and at this time I feel much better. I still receive messages from my sister containing various insults, but I told her a bit ago that I'd not longer open the messages. Her carrying on with it just shows how childish she is. I've put the situation behind me and maybe one day she will too. I still love her, and her children. I hope that one day things will be the same again.

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