1/24/14

So last night actually went pretty well. My parents are just frustrated. But I don’t blame them. I feel the same way. So today has been good so far. Its Friday! TGIF! I’ve been invited to go partying in the next month or so with some of my friends! We will be going to a teen club or rave! That’s one of my favorite things to do! Then I was thinking if I’m still here during Valentines Day, I’m going to be romantic! I really like this girl. Shes so perfect to me. I decided I’m going to get her a rose, a piece of jewelry, and sing her a song! I thought about the song and it came to me; Just The Way You Are by Bruno Mars. I’m going to try and find someone who will play it on piano for me. I cant wait! I know she will love it! But I’m still cutting and she doesn’t like that. I don’t blame her either. She knows what I’m going through though. She used to be depressed, but she got a lot of help. And she is just an angel. I mean she is a little hard core with her snake bite, but she glows. Her beauty is remarkable. I wish she wasn’t so shy sometimes. We don’t sit together at lunch or anything like that. We hardly text too. But next Friday we are planning to hangout! I’m so excited! Back to the other stuff… supposedly my sister is only mean to me because she is also frustrated. I get that though. I understand she just wants me to get help and get better. Then my parents are still looking for a place for me to go to, hopefully after Valentines Day. So things are looking up in a weird way. I’m trying to only think of the good things, but having people annoy you can make it hard.

Also today I realized why is it that all these girls with one boyfriend or girlfriend after another. I told this girl she need to stop going through boys like water. Soon they will be all gone! Hahaha! Like girls have no self respect anymore. They gravel on the ground for boys. What happened to not being a slut. I have my slutty moments, but I don’t sleep with guys or do things with them. I’m just different I guess. I’ll admit I’ve dated a hand full of guys, but I want a girlfriend again. I’ve only had one girlfriend before. I want another one and I want it with this one girl too. I hope we become more serious by the end of the school year.

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