Beauty Can Hide Such Evil…


What is Love?

Is there a definitive definition and explanation to explain it, and exactly what it is made up of/from?

Is the pinnacle  to Love sexual attraction?

It’s been said that if we believe in God we must believe in Evil, believe in one you must believe in the other, which means if you believe in Love you must also believe in Hate? In 1 Peter 4: 8 it is written:

”Above all, Love each other deeply, because Love covers over a multitude of sins”.

There are many interpretations of the meaning of this passage and that of the many other verses which talk of Love. See this passage in particular I find interesting and I am sure if you look at different versions of the bible you will find it written in many different ways and perhaps a little more clarity on it, but it is the wording that interests me.  Love ‘covers’, that’s just it perhaps, love can’t conquer all but just covers up the mistakes and the sins that are better of not seen?

I can’t say that as a small girl I thought about my wedding day because that would be a lie. My first memories that mean anything to me I remember my dream being to live in flat on my own with just my pet labrador. I now wonder if perhaps this was because my young brain didn’t really understand my sexuality yet as I no concept of it. As I grew and started to gain more control and more of a concept over my own identity, and eventually understand that I was Lesbian, the more my puzzle began to fit together. Now my dream is very different….

Everyday im still single I think of these dreams and I imagine what it might be like if I ever make it and truly  find that happiness. I picture the day, every step meticulously planned to the letter by me and my princess in advance. Her beautiful dress the final piece of the puzzle I won’t yet of seen, I can almost hear the speeches in my head, taste the intoxicating yet perfect cocktails (no ice of course), feel my head spinning in ecstasy from the loud music and my feet aching from the heels that made my arse look so perfect. Then the perfect bed in the hotel sweet, where I fall into the arms of the most beautiful women I have ever seen…my wife. She’s wearing the sort of underwear from Ann Summers that I find so intensely sexy it’s hard not cum there and then. But the moments so perfect, sex isn’t what I want, usually she would be the big spoon but not tonight, tonight I need her to know she’s mine. As I climb in behind her and run my finger tips over every perfect inch of her stunning body, she looks up and we’re caught, stuck in this lingering stare…I never want the moment to end. But then she kisses me, gently and slowly  it’s like fate- our future together is sealed. The most perfect kiss I have ever had. Then as she rests her head on the pillow I reach behind and flick of the bedside lamp, wrapping my arms around her in the darkness and snuggling close she slips her hand into mine, and having had such a perfectly beautiful day, we slip into the most beautiful slumber for the evenings perfect ending. <3

If I had that but never woke up the next day I would have died in the prefect moment, and how could I ever be unhappy with that? I just tried to look for some images on Google to illustrate the dream I just described, but nothing, nothing I found seemed right, nothing was quite what I had imagined?

I’ve think I have just realized how much I enjoy feeling empty and alone sometimes? When everything feels dark, it’s quite and I can shut my eyes I love that! For a second then when I did it I finally felt freedom from my dominating thoughts. I suppose it was a little like meditation, I just tried to concentrate on my breathing and pictured myself under a tree in the middle of deserted meadow.

It wasn’t a storybook sort of, fresh, beautiful, leafy tree. It was a lot more like this. It’s isolated here, someone would have to walk for miles and miles to find you, and why would they? It’s desolate, even the farmer who’s land it is his little regard for it?

Unfortunately, I now have to get ready for work. An old pleasure… now more of a required necessity. Thankfully it requires little brain power to over watch a group of over exited  teenagers.

Stay Sweet Lovers xxx



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