To say that I’m beyond freaked out right now would be an understatement. I think that’s why I can’t seem to fall asleep tonight. Am I thinking to much about this? So I just found out that three people I went to school with, whom were in my class, died. Am I just imagining things or are people dieing younger and younger these days? Maybe it’s the simple fact that they are the same age. I graduated from high school two years ago how can anyone I went to school with just die like that. I’m totally just overthinking everything. I mean come on this isn’t an apocolypse sign or anything that so why am I flipping out. Maybe because these weren’t just random kids I actually talked to them. Granted they weren’t all that nice to me but that doesn’t matter because no one was really all that nice to me. . . sigh. Oh well. This doesn’t mean the end is near. . . but let’s just say for argument’s sake that it is. What exactly does that mean for me. I think the real reason I’m so freaked out about this is because I have an Illness and even though I will never admit it to anyone. I don’t want to die. I really don’t. I want to live a full life and live to see my nephew have kids and stuff like that. Even though I don’t have an extravagent or meaningful life doesn’t mean that I can’t fantisize about having one.
On a different note I think that my sister is really decided about us moving. Which don’t give me wrong I think it’ s a good idea because the landlord is a slumlord and he won’t fix the toilet. It won’t flush and we told him that we were having to plunge it every time we flushed the toilet and he totally ignored us and then when he finally comes over with a guy to fix it. He tells the guy to stop fixing it and tells us we need to get a bucket and scoop it out first. Like seriously who in there right minds would do that? that’s just discusting. Like if we could flush it we totally would you idiot and if you would have came over a month ago like we asked we wouldn’t be having this problem and then they wonder why they can’t get anyone to rent off of them. Moron’s that is what the city of Mansfield consists of, Lazy ass people that’s what.
So yeah that’s what our plans are as soon as I get my walking boot and can help move and stuff. I just hope everything will be fine after they take the cast off and that I will be able to walk again. I seriously have no idea why I was born a clumsy person, but I hope the metal plate will help me and I hope when I walk on it that it won’t feel uncomfortable. The doctor said if it is uncomfortable or painful that I will have to have surgery again. I don’t want that. Especially after I read it up online it said when having that kind of procedure sometimes they have to do a whole bunch of surgery’s ’cause doctors screw everything up.
Anyways I hope I can actually get some sleep now.