April 17, 2014 – Step by Step

Step by Step
Thursday, April 17, 2014

Today, if I have avoided honesty in a relationship that was forged in drinking but now is broken because I have moved on to recovery and the other person hasn’t, I must confront the possibility that I have out-grown the relationship if the other person chooses not to walk with me in sobriety. Just like the drinking alcoholic who lost his family and gained sobriety but didn’t get his family back, so it goes with other relationships. As difficult and painful the decision, the choice may be that my own recovery and sobriety are at the risk if I stay with a partner who is not – and may never be – ready or willing to get better with me. And an unfortunate and unintended product of sobering up may be the self-realization that I might not like the spouse or partner with whom alcohol was the binding glue our relationship. And a tough choice may boil down to the stark fact that I cannot sacrifice my sobriety to salvage a relationship that, in recovery, may not be healthy enough to salvage. Today, if I have to end a relationship because I am becoming healthier and the other person is becoming sicker, I need only to look to the members of my group for validation. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M., 2014

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