okay i have a billion thoughts running through my cranium. the main one is i got asked out on a date earlier today. i was super excited but as time went along im nervous as fuck. she keeps saying im beautiful. to me real beauty in a person lies in face to face. im not saying im ugly. i know i can be an attractive women.  everyone has there own insecurities. she has children. ive been with women before that have had children. has never been a problem or a second thought. now im sacred.ive been on blind dates before. everyone has jitters. im terrified. ive been wanting to find a partner so so long now. its been a year and 4 months. yes i have been counting. now that the opportunity has risen. idk. i feel like the 17 year girl again the doesnt know what being in love is or what relationships entail. shes just inside herself. cause thats all she knows.

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