I have no idea what to do. I’m surprised you even messaged me back. Too bad my phone was messing up and I didn’t get it until hours later…mehh. I’ve considered showing you my journal. I’ve considered trying to get into a law school in Cali and seeing what happens with us if I do get accepted and move out there. Then the next day I decide I like my comfortable situation and should just settle and get married.

Every day is going to be a stressful emotional battle if you are in my life. I will continually be conflicted in regards to my feelings. My weary weary heart. I wish I could sleep…. Besides that I hate my friends. I always am second best, at best. I feel like I’m not good enough for anyone….never a first choice.


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