Some sorta way //:

When i’m upset ? 

i Shut myself down , i have no motivation for anything . I think about all the negative things , i can possibly think of . I give myself all the pain thinking i deserve it , i’m not pretty sure why i do that , but that’s just how  i am  because i don’t want to keep my anger inside and it builds up & it burst -.- things happen like that all the time & i really don’t understand why , i’m always fighting a battle of stress or depression ALL THE DAMN TIME , seems like nothing matters too me anymore -.- Sense 5 years ago nothing’s been the same , my mom left she died , everything hurts me so bad , that’s all i constantly think about , it never GOES away i wish it did . I haven’t had an real smile or laugh for 2 whole months i always fake one , too make it seem like it’s all okay & i have an perfect life fulled with flowers & butterflies , but behind that smile is reckless & depression , sleepless night tears everyday & worries  , nightmares everything ! ugh . But i wish everything would hurry & go away soon & fast! Nothing matters anymore , people gave up on me & nobody’s by my side but it’s ard . I Hope i can have an real smile & laugh soon, i hate being worried & depressed .  

One thought on “Some sorta way //:”

  1. Its Okay Kayla.. I Know How You Feel.. I Mean.. I Still Have My Mom And All..Sorry For Your Loss 🙁 .. But I Know What You’re Going Through.. I Know My Comment Its Really Really Late And Stuff.. But I Just Signed Up For This Thing.. And Your Post Is The First One I Saw.. I Just Thought I Should Tell You That You’ll Be Alright.. I Suffer From Depression Too.. No One Really Knows.. But I Do.. It’s Hard.. But I’ll Get Through This.. We’ll Get Through This.. 🙂

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