I’ve got an issue here. A very serious one. I don’t know how to deal with it, or if I should deal with it. Mybe it’s better to just wait, but on the other hand this can cause lots of trouble.
You see, 5 days ago I came v=back from a schooltrip to Greece where lots of cool shit happened. I’ve met some freakingly amazing people that I absolutely adore and for sure I don’t want to loose them. The issue is that one of them became my boyfriend. So we have like the long dstance relationship thingy going on.
I really like him but I’m not sure if I love him the way he loves me. He is so cute, keeps on texting me all the time saying the sweetest things to me, we talk from cam and stuff like that, he is so into me, loves me like crazy and gets so nervous when we are talking. The problem is that he wants to find a summer job to get enough money to come to see me.
I fell a little bit guilty. Maybe we took the whole thing a little too fast because we didn’t have enough days. I mean for the moment everything seem right and perfectly fine. But the moment I left the country I started questioning if the whole thing was actually a good idea worth trying to make it last as long as possible. I am just not sure if we are meant to be together or if I’m that interested in him.
I guess from what I’ve experenced with relationships in my life; even though I haven’t had many and I’m only sixteen, I’m not that person that will stay commited and dedicated to someone for long. I kinda feel like I’m being trapped and not free to do my own thing. So I guess I’m the one who’s got the fault. But that’s who I am and how I feel.
I don’t know what I should do with him cause I honestly would feel so terrible to break his heart cause he is an amazing guy. But I also don’t want to break my heart in order to keep someone else happy. It might sound selfish but I want me to be okay. I’ve had enough making others happy by limiting my self.
I just need a little help here to make the great desicion, that will be heartbreaking either for him or for me..