Don’t you ever felt the needs to cry but known that you have to stand strong. If so, that’s how I feel now. When I finally opened up my eyes, I realized everything had changed. I feel lonely and desperate. Listening to music repeating and has so much thought about what had going on with this world and my life that I have living in. My mother disgraced me, my friends changed and betrayed me and I am standing there astonished and don’t know what to do. I have struggling for 19 years almost 20 and couldn’t find the love of my own. Because no family and friends of mine gave me a reasons to be loved. Looking in the mirror and I see me with all those negative vibes but hidden behind my smile in front of the crowd. When I am alone, I had breakdown and cried because I couldn’t take it anymore. I just wanted to make a pain go away but I can’t because there is no solutions to it. I tried so hard to talk to someone, get help and everything but none of it help so I dealt with it on my own. People stared at me as an deaf person, they felt pity and I felt weak. Just known that I do not have a prefect life and this is a life I am suffering for.