Jan 10th, 2015

It’s true folks.  You wouldn’t believe it but here it is…
I went out yesterday.
Crazy huh??

WHAT HAPPENED YESTERDAY NIGHT AT THE PARTY
-Discovered Nat (party hostess extraordinare) has these two adorable puppies (they were 8 but whatever) and they were the sweetest things in the world oh my goodness
-She also had a sorta indoor pool
-I went swimming for the first time in ages (beaches don’t count)(y’all don’t know about the beaches) with Zach, Allie, Sammi, Joseph, and Georgia
-When Allie, Sammi, and Georgia got out the three of us left literally just spent the time jumping in and racing I love swimming dude
-At one point I was talking to Charly and we couldn’t stop cracking up the entire time.  We were both almost in tears it was brilliant
-We eventually moved inside because it was so cold in the sorta indoor pool room thing!  (There was torrential rainfall last night brilliant weather for swimming)
-Inside, there was very heated discussion about the following topics: politics, the judicial system, religious beliefs, whether the moon landing in 1969 happened, book recommendations
-Those topics were discussed between Allie, Sammi, and I (with occasional Lil’s and Jess’s)
-When Zach and I had to go (because he gave me a lift home the dear) we ended up hanging with TJ, Beth, Nat, Charly, and Zoe in the sorta indoor swimming pool thing for ages dancing and laughing and whatnot
-I ate WAAAAAY too much

THINGS I WAS GRATEFUL FOR YESTERDAY
-Nat, for throwing an absolutely stellar/chill party
-Charly and Joseph and Sammi for including me in things.  I’m not great at parties and getting myself into conversations, so I’m glad they helped me with it (Allie and I talked a lot too but she is also very strongly opinionated so it’s hard for me to get a word in when she’s talking)
-Zach, for literally forcing me to go.  I’ve been quite not good recently (like with everything that happened with me and mum and recently (for about 2 weeks or so) I’ve been seeing and hearing things that aren’t there which is kind of worrying) so getting out and like being around actual people was really good for me

NOW ON TO TODAY
So I had this weird nightmare where I was on this street that I know very well with a girl I was friends with for about a year in primary school mixed with a girl I was sort of friends with in my first high school, and there were hundreds of dead bodies everywhere.  And they were all hidden, hundreds stuffed under cars, every car we passed had at least twenty dead bodies under it.  It got to the point where it wasn’t even scary it was just like ‘Oh look, more dead bodies’.  And then we went into this store that’s in an alarming number of my dreams and also doesn’t exist and she kind of got pulled into the computer thing that you choose what you want to buy on and came out as one of the dead bodies.
Weird dream man (the next one was nicer and had an easier meaning so I won’t bother writing it).

But I woke up super early with an awful taste in my mouth, so I went and got some water and as I was laying down I felt it alllllll coming up.  So I sat up and I just thought ‘NOPE THIS IS NOT HAPPENING TODAY YOU HAVEN’T THROWN UP SINCE YOU WERE LIKE 7 IT’S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN NOW’ and I couldn’t lie back down for another 30 minutes or so just trying to will myself not to throw up.
So that’s a big reason that you shouldn’t eat extreme amount of sausage rolls at parties.

Also, Avatar: The Last Airbender marathon.  Still going.  Still awesome.  Season 3 is the best season ever.

I’ve been really self conscious about my personality recently.  I’m really awkward socially (#socialanxietylyf) and I’m not very funny or charismatic. I just don’t know how to make people happy, which sucks because that’s all I want to do with my life.  Even Zach agrees, he says he see’s ‘glimpses’ of the funny/charismatic side of me, which you can understand is a little off putting.  It’s just kinda sucky.

This is a perfect time for
THINGS I AM GRATEFUL FOR TODAY
-My dad, he went shopping again so we have food in the house again!
-Chocolate ice-cream.  Lord knows I missed it!
-Avatar: The Last Airbender.  Seriously, the best children’s cartoon, equal parts intense and funny.  It is just so good!

That’s it for now my loveliest of lovelies, and as always
Happy tomorrow 🙂 🙂

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