hanging in there…

It’s one of those days…. struggling to stay positive… feeling sad… trying to push it away just like i always do… things will turn around…. i know they will.. they always have….it’s just a bit hard now.. need to lift my mood myself.. this is exciting.. a diary.. havnt written one since…. 2002 maybe? Lets see if this brings me any peace! Peace…. what a word.. i used to know what that was…. i used to not even need to create it or make any effort to feel it…. i just had it… everything around me felt peacefull… now it’s like i have changed… became somebdy i never was… can a person even change that much? I never used to believe it…. i always believed a person stays who they are no matter what happens in their lifes.. i mean deep down inside…. my “deep down inside” seems to be some where too deep…. it seems i cant reach it anymore…. pilates were nice this morning though…. refreshed after shower im trying to not let this upcoming cold reach me…or bother me too much… im looking for reasons to be excited again in my life…. little things…. family… friends…work….i am blessed though… so far i have been very lucky in my life…. most of the decissions i’ve made  have turned out to be right… right for me in my life… i just need to remember what my life is all about right now and appriciate everything in it… no matter how hard it sometimes proves to be…everybody has their own struggles and its just the choices u make in life that makes u love it or not…. a great saying comes to mind: only we ourselfs are reponsible for how our lives turn out!  it’s so true!  

One thought on “hanging in there…”

  1. Hi there! I think journals/diaries are great therapy and a good way to get everything out. It sounds like you have the right focus even if you are feeling sad right now. It’s okay to feel sad, what is real is real. But you are right, we are the products of our own choices. Peace will come again.

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