I believe that being a woman brings a lot more than just a woman. Eventually for most of us it will also become mother, a wife and all these roles come into play making it almost impossible to balance it out. I have a 7 month healthy, precious baby boy. I never knew how much love I could feel for another being until he came into my life! I also never knew how much of me he would take as well. I earned the title of being a mother at 22. Although I’m not married yet I do live with my baby’s father and have been with him for about 3 years. The three of us make a little family! The family I will fight for to stay together. I’m saying this because it hasn’t been easy and everything at this point is not so great. A lot of it I guess has to do with myself.
My body isn’t the same anymore after my pregnancy, my sex life doesn’t have the same drive it used to and time for myself I can’t seem to have. Theses things I’ve read in magazines, books, blogs it’s nothing new that happens to a lot of women after they have children. At this point, there are so many things that are just not right that I don’t know where to start. Sometimes I feel like leaving the house for a moment and scream, but then I feel guilty of thinking that because I love my son I don’t regret a thing! I just wish I had everything together and for everything to just be okay!
All I know is that these things that keep me up at night is because I am not only just a mom, I’m a woman. A woman has other things she needs to be happy. I know it won’t always be like this because eventually pieces will start to come together and handling every aspect of my life will come naturally. But I guess that’s my journey now as a woman and a mother to live for myself and my family. Goodnight Journal