the world is an empty place
somehow full of lonely people
in lonely places.
we’re all pretending.
pretending joy
faking love
basking in self-centered “compassion”
because too often we’re not enough
for ourselves.
because we play self-sufficient
because we say we don’t need
anyone else to make us happy.
we are afraid to feel,
to feel like we need someone.
someone who will make the world
feel bright again
because everything is
black and white
and right and wrong
when everything should be
bursting colors
and your own personal happiness
free from condemnation
free from questions asking
why you aren’t enough for yourself
is it so wrong to need someone?
is it so wrong that
you need to hear “I love you”
from his lips to
witness the colors of the sunset?
everyone says to love yourself
but what if you can’t?
why if I need someone
to do it for me?
what if I wear my heart
so plainly because I
need you to see how empty it is
need you to see how ready
it is to love
and that when you touch it
it becomes so completely
and what if when that happens
you get scared
and I get scared
and out of concern for each other
and imagined tiredness and boredom
we both pull away
and we both become hard
and walls are built to
protect vaults that were
once so full of happiness
so close to love
but are now so tired of
experiencing anything
and we remember only the
hurt and the pain
and we lash out
forgetting what we once
meant to each other
and we exhaust our already
exhausted hearts
we see lies where
we once saw truth
and our hearts turn
away form the thought of love
and we pretend like the rest
that we are happier alone.

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