I wish I could forget…

I don’t know why I still let him get to me. I don’t know why I still let it hurt when he lets me down, I always expect it.

My ex husband is visiting, bringing back my daughter from visitation.  He made a promise to me… I knew he wouldn’t keep it but it still hurt when he bailed on me. He then told me that he would do something else for me… again I was just an after thought, again he let me down. I don’t trust him, I don’t expect him to be there for me… and yet it still hurts when he proves me right… and still I wait for him. He thinks of me last always , and still I find myself thinking of him first. I hate this. I hate that I give him the power to hurt me. I hate that I still want to believe in him.

I wish that I could just make my heart forget that I loved him. I wish I could forget.

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