Trying to change the way I think of things.

Today was my second meeting, today I put my jacket and shoes on and caught the 26 bus to town. I smoked my cigarette outside and pressed the buzzer to go in. There was the man, known as my key worker. I was seated facing him, this was my second meeting. I felt nervous, really nervous knowing everything can be so confusing and mixed up and I’m not going the only one to be dealing with this sort of feeling.

That’s right I’m talking about trying to change the way I think of things, well I’m trying too. I thought it would be a good idea to start writing down online the way I’m feeling and what I do in my day to day life. Not naming anyone, my locations but describing in detail so I’m practically not actually giving anything anyway. I’m currently watching finding nemo whilst drinking some beer also known as Skoi. Its got to the bit in finding nemo where there having the meeting about fish and how about how they haven’t eaten many fish in a while well the sharks. 

I’m also thinking that I’ve got work in the morning and I’m becoming drained and tired. That’s what my day consisted of today wearing worn jeans, etnies trainers, a animal t shirt and a grey hoodie along with about ten pound in my wallet, taking a ride on the 26 bus to town and achieving that bus. Yes I do feel I’m changing for the better but my one fear on my mind… Will that buzzer get the better of me? maybe one day I won’t be able to walk into that building. I dont know, but I’ve been today and I’m feeling change and I’m trying.

I’m doing this for one person in my life. Not just myself. 

Good night world. 

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