Inner Shadows call

You don’t know the shadows, you don’t know the pain, you don’t know the whispers, you have no idea the shame. To live without a purpose, an existence with no meaning. A life with too much time. A demon that even the shadows have cast away, have you any idea what I say.? I’m saying there is pain, there will be pain, there is always pain. How can you grow to understand what I am.? How can you conceive this hell I am in, if you can not even see past your own hand?. How can you comfort me, if you do not yet identify with me?. I tell you nothing will change, what has happened, what did happen, what will happen. Nothing really changes, it only takes up a new face, while the mirrors reflect that, it can never show the inside, just as you may never see my inside. There are some nights my friend, where I question everything. Where I do not know if I am dying or being born again. Where I do not know what the worst part is. Shall I say my pain?, my loneliness?, this void that the darkness has build inside me?. Shall I say it is just me? Then you may never conceive that this is something you could become. Perhaps it is just me and this inside under my skin, however wrong it may feel,or I may feel. I am, I remain,(laughs and jokes) I stay like a plague. These shadows are as normal to me as the air to you. The dreamless sleep like walking, the pain like words so normal. Still there are nights like these, where I notice it the most, and it troubles me.

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