Don’t worry you won’t be getting a new post everyday I will probably end up only doing these once a month or maybe even less but today is the last day if summer. I know it says it’s like Wednesday or something on the bit where is says when this is posted but it’s not I don’t know where it is Wednesday but I would love it to be yesterday again. It 3:39 and I am freaking out. We go back to school tomorrow and I go into year 10 which means I’m starting my GCSE’s which means anxiety goes even more mental than usual which means a lot of panic attacks which means a lot of unwanted attention and stares. So yeah who doesn’t love back to school…no one at school likes me I have literally seen 5 people throughout the summer and I don’t want to see anyone else I wasn’t even looking forward to seeing most of them. It’s really bad. I don’t know if I have written about my anxiety on my last post but yeah in case you hadn’t gathered already I do suffer from anxiety and when I say suffer I mean suffer; It controls me. I can’t do anything without getting anxious or panicky about it and I hate it so much when people fake anxiety like it’s not a fucking joke you don’t know what it’s like. I can’t order my food in a restaurant or café, buy things from a till, get my hair cut or even simply saying excuse me or asking someone to pass me something without panicking. Faking mental disorders is sick. So as you can imagine school is literally hell on earth for me not because I hate learning but I hate all the people and the whole concept of everything surrounding it. People think I over-react and do it for attention and just need to grow up but seriously no never say that to a person with anxiety because you have no idea how hard it is to get through the day in one peace. Ugh some people sicken me… getting nervous before an exam or before a big even does not count as anxiety like seriously! Do you suffer with anxiety or know anyone who does? Let me know if you have any stories or anything.
Oh and I am not sure if you can reply to here but you can always dm me on my Instagram @_society.will.kill.us.all_ I write my own quotes so yeah go ahead i’m always here .
That Girl <3
Relatable song of the day: Lullaby by Professor Green
‘Sick of pretending to be so happy
All the while my anxiety’s away at me
My skin crawling, I look up to the sky
And it falls, the walls close in and it’s
As if all the good in my life disappears
In an instant, that thing is just so distant
So seeing the ones who I love, the ones who love me
But I don’t wanna tell em how I feel in case they judge me
It’s just me, wish I could let somebody in
But I ain’t ever been too trusting’