food or not food

Trying to lose weight for me is quite difficult. I am not very tall a little over 5.2″ and weigh over 10.5 stone on a bad day,,sometimes I think I even tip the scale at almost 11 stone.

To make matters worse I have suffered from IBS for the last 10 -15 years but, have only made a connection a few years ago. I know that processed foods are my enemy but, there are times when my body is craving for them so much so that I find myself binging for biscuits when no one is looking. I tell my self I will not eat any more take out foods but, when the family want to order out every couple of weeks I find myself going week at the thought of chicken burgers, pizza’s and chips and loose resolve and order. I tell my self this is the last time or that I will only eat a few chips…but, do I heck I eat the chips and continue to eat until the last greasy chip is consumed. After dinner I suffer from painful stomach pains, the pain so bad it extends to my back.

 

I know the fault is mine I should watch what I eat, I should also chew more and eat smaller morsels…and most of all stop eating when my stomach screams at me to. I have tried this at different periods in the last year and when I do I feel great my stomach is not bloated (I do not look pregnant) the only down fall is I always feel hungry or I think I feel hungry.

This of course is the psychology of the subject..I mean my body is not really suffering from hunger pangs but, more from the sugar cravings which I have become so accustomed to. Why do I do it time and time again fall into the pattern of eating and eating until I my stomach is too painful to move.

What needs to happen before I start to exercise without making an excuse of giving up because I have to go to work, or tell my self I’ll go to the gym once I have gotten my bad eating habits in order.

Am I really that weak willed that I cannot even go a day without eating the foods that are slowly killing me. Does the thought of having to buy clothes one size larger not scare the living day lights of of me? It should but, the guilt and fear only last as long as it takes for the next food craving to hit me.

Some may even question what my reason is for eating so often? Am I trying to fill a void in my life or I’m I just plain bored. I think I am plain bored. I mean I get up go to work, come home and basically that’s it. My social life is lost somewhere maybe it has ran away in search of some fun quite obvious it’s not getting any between my hectic work schedule and dull home life.

Please some one read my journal. Leave a comment I’m not bothered what you say I may even come back with some claws….

2 thoughts on “food or not food”

  1. Today I started to use the colories app on my Samsung phone.
    By lunch time and four Ryvitas civered in bitter I was already upto my recommendd calorie intake. I had some fruit..dinner dawns and so do my hunger pangs….I must…I must resist naughty but delightful foods…..

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