2 Years On September 18,2015

Hello I just re:found this good night journal. Lets see since I last posted my knee had been swollen and in a lot of pain. My doc put me on some kind of med did not work. I finally went too a bone doc and he gave me something for the pain and swelling. I had tendenitice and Bursities in my right knee. It still a little puffed up but not as bad as it was before. Hubby and I plan on doing some add on to this trailer soon as we can find someone too get a price they will need to do it all. Well as the title says 2 years as of Sept 18,2013 at 2:45pm my mom passed away. I will never forget that day ever. I know a lot of people do not know what I saw just a few hours before. The most awsome part is when the bear showed up not 10 mins after she passed. I know everyone is telling me not too feel sad or get real bummed out this coming Friday. I am going too do my very best not too feel sad or down I am going to do something fun and be happy. Yeah right who am I kidding. It’s my mom I do miss her we had a lot of awful fights and gave her hard times. Stuberness runs in the family. Though if you could ask my mom she said I’m not stubron your grandmother is LOL I am sure my mom and dad have forgotten all the bad and are just remembering the fun and happy times. Like graduations us getting married first dances boys/girl friends that came in and out of our lives. I do not know why those who are left behind feel guilty or mad or get so depressed that they themselves take their own lives? No I’m in no way shape or form going to end my life. Just putting that out there before someone starts getting worried. I am just saying if someone is in that kind of state then he or she needs too get help or talk to someone they trust till they feel better. My mom and my dad had cancer. All us kids and some of the grandkids where there when my mom took her last breath. My brother and myself saw her take her take her last breath and she was gone. Not a second after the nurse walked in and said oh dear Oh has she passed? She went over checked her vitals and looked at us all and nodded and said yes she is gone home. We all lost it again. I called my husband and my best friends. I stood there while in tears said mom please tell dad I’m sorry I was not there before he passed and that I love him and you mom always. I said it so loud I’m sure everyone in the other rooms heard me. Just a very hard and awful day. Wish they where both still alive. Well that is why Sept 18,2013 is a really bad memory….Witchgirl.

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