Your Visits

I can never get enough of when you come to visit me. I seen you twice last night. The second time I was laying in your arms crying as I drifted to sleep. You quietly asked me what was wrong. I told you that I knew when I awoke the next morning, I would roll over and you wouldn’t be there. You kissed my hair, told my you loved me, and to sleep. You knew too.

Why is this so damn difficult? Why does it get harder to let you go instead of easier? I know that when my life gets harder, crazier and I feel like I am spinning out of control because I am trying to do everything myself and I am trying to be everything to everyone, you are my comfort, my rock, and my groundings. But you are no longer here with me. I can’t depend on you to hold me up like you use to. You are not here. You are not here. There are days when I need you so badly to tell me it will be okay…… Maybe….Maybe…that’s why you come to me when I am sleeping. To let me know, that I am going to be okay….until our next visit…

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