I have never felt as alone as I do right now. I once again am having a terrible semester and once again I am doing nothing to change it. The worst part is that I have nobody to talk to. I am too embarrassed to tell anybody about how my life is absolutely falling apart and I feel like if I do tell people, they will only make fun of me or call me a loser. I am living a lie and it is truly terrifying to me that I can’t seem to do anything about it. I really do want to do better, but there is just no motivation to do anything. The only people that have any idea of what I am dealing with are my roommates, and all they do is say that I am basically worthless. All the lying has put a mountain of pressure on me, and the only thing that I ever think about is how to keep the illusion that I am not a complete mess going for as long as I can.