How far I’ve come

So tomorrow will be 14 days Facebook Free…14 days since I woke up and realised something had to give, since I started my change, since I started my journal, since I started the #LoveMe Challenge. I never ever thought I would be able to not use Facebook for even 1 day let alone 14….this is unheard of for me. I have been 14 days free of hurting myself. Sure there have been lows, but I’ve never given in. The more I think about it….it was time. My body was telling me it was full, it couldn’t handle any more. My brain was over-loaded and cluttered. My heart was heavy. I felt so heavy. I still feel heavy- but not like I did 13 days ago. I have started to get people asking me what’s going on, why can’t they see my Facebook profile anymore? I tell them the truth – I deactivated it because I needed to make more mental and emotional room in my brain and body. You know there is not one person who has laughed or said that’s stupid. They have all said – wow I wish I could do that! I tell them to do it – it’s quite amazing. I had a colleague ask me today if everything was ok with me – was I ok? I said I’m working through a few things. She named my friend and said ‘She’s helping you isn’t she?’ I said ‘Yes, she is my hero, I don’t know what I’d do without her’. She replied ‘You don’t know how much she loves you hey’. It bought tears to my eyes..I couldn’t answer her. In my head I was saying ‘You don’t know how much I love her too’.

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