I didn’t write anything last night. I was so caught up in doing things. Reached home around 7 and then had some or the other work. Let’s just be honest 😛 I was wasting most of my time and waiting for Mobin’s call or text. We spoke for a few minutes. I was not in a good mood as usual but this time it was because I found out that my sister and preeti went to Asian house where Sultan was playing. And he treated preeti like a celebrity, I know i know that’s really sweet but I bloody introduced him to them and now he ditches me?. Okay, I’m over exaggerating, I shut him down, so not his fault entirely and this shouldn’t affect me that much. But I just felt so unattractive and like I didn’t matter at all. I want someone to look at me and like me instantly. I know it’s kind of shallow but that’s what I want. Although that doesn’t really have an effect on guys. The deadly combination is a girt with beauty and brains. I think I’ve got brains but the beauty part is what I’ve to achieve. All I’m is “CUTE” which I hate. I want to be hot and sexy. Or at least one of them. All my friends are more beautiful than and that’s where my insecurities start. When we go out, all the guys look at them and flirt with them and not me. I feel left out, abandoned and that’s the reason why I keep quiet or try to make a fool out of myself. I’m always so concerned about what other people think of me that I forgot to know what I think of myself.
I watched an Interview of Kangana Ranaut yesterday, damn she was really brave and one of a great. A great person, speaks her mind and never afraid to open up. Although I don’t remember what she said exactly, I’m gonna watch the video now and write what she said. The things that she said made me like her even more. She said people’s opinion and perception of us will change, so it is important for us to know who we are and not get affected by others opinion. It was something like that. I’ve so much to write, I think I’m gonna start another post.