the “what ifs”

Its almost 5 , the weather is a tiny bit chill, not windy not hot , perfect weather for a walk , perfect weather to be outside.

Its the weekend .

We should be together , this is not how i thought things will be .

Last year at this time we were together, we were happy . i was happy .

Today im home alone , in bed huging a pillow and having a case of the what ifs.

There are at least 5 people i can text right now and be out with in less than 30 minutes . But i dont want to . In my “what ifs” its me and him , not me and some guy or me and friends .

Its sad isn’t it . how I’m stuck on him. While he doesnt want anything to do with me .

Its the weekend , he’s probably out , he might end his day with someone… it wont be the first time .

Other than that my guts tell me that he’s with someone else, he has someone new in his life , its just a feeling, but i know its true . he has someone new. No one is ever this busy , no one changes this fast .

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