starting over

I need to get my shit together. I made a list of stuff to do for the next four days and its all reasonable stuff so i know i can do it. Being on independent study is a blessing to me but honestly im so bored and with me being bored leads to depression. If i get stuck in a loop hole of sadness and self pity again it will be a nightmare. Im clean off drugs, self harm, and drinking. Finally. Im finally doing something good that actually gets recognized. I have As and Bs in school. Im a bit stressed because my classes are backed up due to the amount i need to retake. But ill be okay. My mom is depressed and out of work right now. we live with my grandparents and my grandmother is dying of cancer. My mother is having a very hard time with this. Seeing my mom depressed makes me very upset but it also makes me want to show her that she can get better. If i can do good then so can she. Today is the first day of the rest of my life. I want to do better to make not only myself happy, but the people around me happy. Im reading positive quotes and listening to positive music and i am just going to get my life on track. when a bad day comes i just have to remember that some days must be gloomy in order to have a sunny day. ill be alright. i got this.

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