Right from wrong

I know having sexual intercourse with my cousin was wrong. But it felt so right. To be honest, I’ve always felt some special way for him. Not sure if it’s the same way for him. But it is for me. We have defiantly always had a sexual tension. When we were younger we used to kiss and hump each other and stuff. So this has always been there. The other night was just the first time we acted upon it.

I love my cousin, but not in a cousin type love. But I could never tell him that. It’s killing me. I hate the thought of all of this and I hate the fact that all this has a word for it. Incest just seems so gross, so vulgar. I hate it. It isn’t my fault I have feelings for him. I’m trying to push them down and bury them like I had before. But it’s like us doing that, that night dug up all these emotions I had forgotten I had. I pray to God for forgiveness and I prayed that he’d help me make sense of what the hell all these thoughts mean. But I don’t think I’m going to have a break through anytime soon. Wow. I really am mentally disturbed.

3 thoughts on “Right from wrong”

  1. I’ve seen both of your posts, and if it makes you feel any better it actually isn’t incest between cousins. Plenty of my friends are cousins and are married to each other, my own parents are cousins. The only time it is classed as incest is when sex takes place between a parent, child, sibling, grandchild. However, saying that, the only reason why cousins having sex is frowned upon in society is because the likelihood of having a child with that person might end up being physically disabled – I don’t think that’s a proven fact though because I’m not disabled.

    Hope this helps..

  2. Are you first cousins? Either way, I also don’t think there’s anything wrong with incestuous relationships between cousins. Immediate family (brother/sister, father/daughter) yes, but cousins marrying/sleeping with cousins doesn’t bother me much. It almost makes sense. They’re close to you in that they’ll have some genetic traits that may make you more compatible, but not so close that it’s in your immediate family.
    Depending on where you live, though, this could be a HUGE deal if every found out.

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