Betrayal lies Deep

The tears burn while running down my face. My eyes are starting to hurt from wiping the tears away. It’s been so long since I have cried like this. My heart just aches. The feeling of betrayal lingers  throughout my body.  Nothing hurts as bad as this does. Shortly after my 16th birthday my security was ripped from me. Nothing has been the same since then. My father decided to leave us. He left for another women. He didn’t just leave us for another women, he left us for another family. If that wasn’t hard enough, insisted on taking everything I ever loved away. I gave up my friends, my hobbies, and happiness. I only can take so much before I take a blade to my wrist and thigh. He has me blaming myself, hating myself for all the pain he has caused me. Soon enough I’m in a dark place. I place of self-hate and self-harm. My own family, my own father just stands by watching me suffer like he is amused by it. He does not try to help, instead he makes the suffering worse. Now as the the tears are burning and my wrist are bleeding, he is in our home with another women and two other kids. I’m crying for help in a home without a dad I desperately need. The tears are dried, the bleeding has stopped, and a smile appears followed by an I’m fine. 

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