New Beginnings

What could possibly be a better time to start a journal than the first day of a new year?  I love new years because it renews my beliefs in fresh starts, and shiny new beginnings.  Right now I find myself at the mercy of my moods and not as happy as I should be.  In 2015 I got my cat back, became a registered nurse, got engaged, and moved into an apartment that I actually quite like though I am not happy with myself.  To most of the world I portray a positive attitude, I am very nice, and actually a people pleaser.  Inside me is completely different.  I am negative, unsure, fearful, lacking in confidence and self esteem, and just sort of a mess.  This year I wish for peace, clarity, happiness, confidence, gratitude, and wholeness.  I want to go back to the drawing board quite literally and find myself.  I want to draw again because its what I am meant to do.  I want to find my mantra and meditate like I used to, to bring power back into my life.  I want my heart to stay open.  I want energy to flow through me from my head to the tips of my toes.  I want to dance and sing. I want to be me.  Goodnight journal.

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