What could possibly be a better time to start a journal than the first day of a new year? I love new years because it renews my beliefs in fresh starts, and shiny new beginnings. Right now I find myself at the mercy of my moods and not as happy as I should be. In 2015 I got my cat back, became a registered nurse, got engaged, and moved into an apartment that I actually quite like though I am not happy with myself. To most of the world I portray a positive attitude, I am very nice, and actually a people pleaser. Inside me is completely different. I am negative, unsure, fearful, lacking in confidence and self esteem, and just sort of a mess. This year I wish for peace, clarity, happiness, confidence, gratitude, and wholeness. I want to go back to the drawing board quite literally and find myself. I want to draw again because its what I am meant to do. I want to find my mantra and meditate like I used to, to bring power back into my life. I want my heart to stay open. I want energy to flow through me from my head to the tips of my toes. I want to dance and sing. I want to be me. Goodnight journal.