Borderline lover

Afraid to be alone

A sickness within
Come to my rescue
let me suck you in
I will tell you everything
that you want to hear
I will put u on a pedistal
And pull you near
I will make you feel special
So You can’t stay away
I will make sure you smile
each and every day
Then when I have you
I won’t believe it’s true
there is nothing you can say
or anything you can do
my mind will tell me lies
one right after another
I try to remain calm
But it’s only a cover
I feel empty, unsatisfied and
Make the relationship tough
No matter what you say
It will never be enough
The emotions stir
And soon will flood
The only cure sometimes
to see my own blood
I cut into my skin
to relase some of the pain
then I cover them up
because of all the shame
During this time
I’m ignoring your needs
only looking at myself
out of selfishness and greed
You start to feel confused
and try to express that to me
But I’m so lost in myself
It is impossible to see
When you try to speak
All I feel is an attack
I begin to lash out
I don’t know how to react
My mind tells me
your going to get up and leave
My hearts beating so fast
It makes it hard for me to breath
You finally can’t take anymore
and tell me were through
I kept pushing you away
Until my worst fears were true
The feeling of abandonment
is to much to take in
That’s when it gets worse
And the destruction begins
I don’t know how to cope
Or calm myself down
I feel like I am in the middle of an ocean
just left there to drown
I fight to stay afloat
but the current drags me under
This is a relationship
Of a Borderline Lover

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