a turn for the…..better??

So Its been 2 days since I last wrote. Surprisingly enough I felt guilty for not writing yesterday. That’s probably a good thing to some extent. It means that I’m actually trying to make a change.

Went back to work yesterday full of dread. I tried to have the most positive attitude I could. Not sure if it worked or not. Don’t get me wrong I Love my job. But the last year it got really hard over night. Really overwhelming and because I was always around , I saw my  boss the most which meant we worked well together some days and other were like hell.

Let me tell you a bit about my boss. I like to call him The Dragon Man because he is wise and scary.  He is also a  great guy. Happy family man with wife and kids and really smart. Like really smart. He has this way of speaking to people that I am honestly in awe of because Its a way I just don’t have but I’m trying to adapt. He can make you understand his point of view and even change your mind without you even knowing it. No trickery or games. Just really well spoken. On the flip side he is a Karate master. Ok so that’s not his real title but the man is up there. Uber degrees in black belt and can go from zero to “Oh My Dayum you just got knocked the fuck out” in 0.2 seconds. To watch him demonstrate his skills while he teaches classes is amazing. Its kind of scary but amazing. I have mad respect for him. He is not only my boss, he is also my instructor. Its a bit strange. He is the only guy I know that I can work with all day and then can have him on top of me  seriously invading any personal space I had demonstrating how to put someone in an arm bar and its not weird. Actually it was weird . I’m still getting used to him  but then again  I’m not the most open, huggy, touchy , feely person so I generally don’t like anyone near me or in my personal space. He has been great about that and very mindful  about who to partner me with and has  brought me out of my shell leaps and bounds. I honestly know that no matter where I end up in my career, he has helped begin to shape and show me what I’m made of and has given me life long skills and for that I will always be eternally grateful.

Anyway my boss came in and without meaning to , we ended up having a chat and I told him everything that was going on with me. How I almost had a break down last year. How I couldn’t handle my work and uni and was in and out of the psychologists office. How I was on medication and struggled. I felt it was a really good chat and I have to say since then I have felt scarily elated. I’m incredibly cautiously optimistic that things will get better in my work place.  I expressed that my work load was too much so my boss told me he would take some of the burden off me and to give him a hand over or a HOTO as my other half calls it ( Hand Over Take Over). I think this is a good thing as I was preparing things to hand over to him anyway except they weren’t due until the end of Jan. Now he wants me to have it all ready for Friday!! EEEPPP! I’m sure I will have a few late nights ahead of me but I’m hoping for serenity after that. Fingers crossed….

I also had a chat to one of my co-workers. He reminds me of Hal Jordan , yes as in the Green Lantern. Lol I swear he belongs in the Lantern Corp… so Nerdy… so cool ! I have to say I really like Hal  and have a lot of respect for him but we also butt heads big time. Our work ethics are just different I guess. Anyway at the end of last year I ended my year really pissed with him. But I didn’t want to have that kind of bad juju hanging around so I pulled him aside first chance I got and tried to clear the air. We also had a decent chat and Im hoping that will continue to bring good vibes to my surroundings.

SO I’m going to bed tonight feeling pretty good. I hope this is a turning point for my year because I know with Uni starting and the real hustle and bustle of it starting all over again  I need to take it one day at a time and see how I go.



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