More anger at myself….

Still not happy with the numbers on the scale. I wish that it could be as easy as taking a knife and just carving all the fat off. I’m giving myself a “calorie allowance” of 400 today. Fuck it. IT’s unhealthy. I don’t fucking care. I don’t have anything to lose other than all this blubber. My life sucks. My job sucks. So what if I make myself sick?

Speaking of my job, it really interferes with my goals and that pisses me off. I don’t have a set time to eat, it’s always sporadic. And it’s so draining and I deal with the nastiest, infuriating, disgusting trashy people and it just makes me want to drown my feelings with food. UGH.


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