I’m Totally Lost

Something happened today I never expected would happen, I got a love letter. A love letter from one of my really close guy friends. I usually use the first letter of people’s names to keep privacy, but I’m gonna go ahead and start using completely different names. So, for all intents and purposes, his name is Klaus. I’ve known Klaus for a couple years, but we didn’t get really close until this year. I openly called him my younger brother on many occasions. That’s just what he was, my adopted younger brother, until his friendship intrigued me. I knew he had more to him than the rapid jokes he tells, and I wanted to know what that was. I invited Klaus to accompany me when I took some pictures for an art class. We talked, we laughed. Him and I got into in depth conversations about fear and pain. Then it occurred to me that Klaus was a rare breed of guy. No where, in freshman year, can you find a guy who has such intelligence and insight to life. You can’t ever find anyone to talk seriously with. Ever since then, I’ve had a fondness for him. He’s become less of a brother and more of….I don’t even know. Well, this is a month later, and he handed me a piece of paper after lunch. Inside he wrote a poem. The poem had a flawed structure and didn’t follow any patterns, but I loved it. It was honest and showed what he was thinking. He actually liked me, which is unbelievable to me because most people think I look like a man. My problem is, I’ve been with Sabina for two months. I don’t feel right with Sabina. There isn’t the connection that should be there, I regard her as nothing but a friend inside. I’m worried that Sabina is actually in love with me, while I am not in love with her. 

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