January 19 2016

      So it’s been awhile since I last wrote but I’m back. I went to the emergency room Friday. My mom thinks I’m going crazy. ( maybe she’s right?) The hospital said I could go home but I have a meeting with some doctors and therapist in the next few weeks. My mothers boyfriend got a new house and we will be moving. I’m not sure I can live with these people for much longer. I have been asked so many times if I have thought about suicide. I usually just look at them like they are speaking another language. Do they think I am stupid? I would never take my own life. I have a future, I know even if no one can see it, I do. I will be successful unlike the people in my past. I wont live wondering If I have enough money to get by. I wont be my mother no matter how mad I get I wont hit my child. Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you my mom and I got in a fight. I ended up on the floor choking on the blood that was spilling from my nose. That was the morning before I went to the hospital. And she thinks I am the crazy one. I recently found out I don’t have any friends. The one person who had always been there for me turned out to fear me. I heard her talking to her boyfriend and he asked her why she was friends with me. Her answer hurt so badly but I just act like nothing happened. Her response was that she was scared not to be my friend. Well that’s all for today and thanks to the people who commented on my last entry.

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