This website is basically a place where I can write down all of my feelings and nobody around me will see them. So that’s what I’m going to do. Just freely speak my mind because if I do that around the people who “love” me I will be yelled at and mocked.
Today I got two more letters from different colleges. I also got one yesterday. All of the letters are from great colleges and I’m happy colleges are noticing me but I kind of wish that they didn’t send me letters and just let me figure it out myself. The people around me honestly make me feel like crap about receiving letters. You see, the colleges are very far away and are in different states. That’s not a problem at all actually. I’m not staying in this state for college. I am planning on getting as far away from here as possible. My parents know I want to leave and they don’t say anything about it until colleges are sending letters. The problem is my parents don’t really want me to move away. I say my parents but it’s actually pretty much just my mom. She knows I’m planning on leaving and she pretty much mocks me over it. She is always saying “well, I hope you have a job!” She is not saying it in a supportive way either. That’s just the thing. She knows I am leaving and I believe she thinks I won’t actually make it. I don’t know if she is scared I won’t come back but mocking me is no way of showing it. There is so much behind all of this and I simply can’t say all of it but yea. I just want it to all stop and I want everybody to support me. Nobody has to agree with the choices I make in my life but I am asking that everybody understands that I am doing it to make myself more content and grow with knowledge.