I have not written in a while. Alot has gone on. I am seeing a psychiatrist. I think it will help me get to the root of some of my issues. I have alot. My first appointment is tomorrow. I am so nervous because I know we are going to talk about some dark days I have had in my life. I was really struggling after getting the email from my sons father telling me how much of a crappy mom I am. It put me in a bad place. Then my brother in law gets into a horrific car accident and it throws our family in such a sadness. He is alive, but he has a long road of recovery ahead of him. I spent a whole weekend taking care of him and I didnt mind it because it made me think a little about what is good in my life. Also how the car looked and how he flipped it 6 times and he is alive.
Ilost my faith awhile back and just seeing him survive that acciaccident made me believe in maybe there is a God out there watfhing over us. If he can get a second chance, maybe I can get one too.
So I changed my diet, more healthy. I am working out every other day. I am trying to build stronger relationships with my family. This life thing I have to try better at. I can be a better person for my son, my boyfriend and mostly myself. I owe it to myself to try harder. This year is going to be a good year. I can feel it.