I can’t be bothered, to do anything, I have no motivation and I just, I feel worse everyday and less like myself. The voices are still getting stronger. Right now I just want to close my eyes and never wake up. How do people do it? Cope each day with a huge smile on their face that’s real and meaningful, whereas I’m sat here not coping, not wanting to wake up or even breathe, not wanting to live. I think of things that I’ve gone through and it makes me wonder why I’m still here and why I didn’t end my life. College isn’t helping at the moment. Being accused for something doesn’t help.