Mortality

As a child and young adult, I never slowed down enough to realize the biggest pressing matter which would inevitably consume me whole. I would be utterly powerless in its grasp. Despite having relatives and even a good friend pass on it didn’t occur to me, that I too will one day be no more.

When my belly was swollen and full with unborn life getting ready to make its grand entrance, it hit me hard like a stone wall. This life in me came from seemingly no where. Sure, I know the scientific process and all that… but think about one moment I am me, next I am a creator. As easily as my sweet babe can enter this world, her exit could be faster. If she can go. I can go. Finally my mortality terrified me. Awake in the night, I tried not to cry. Crippling panic weld up inside me.

It took a few years, but I’ve made my peace. I no longer worry about this absolute fact. No matter what I do, I can not stop it. So I go on. I live my life. I love my life. It’s precious to me. I take the time to value myself, my family, and everything that makes me smile. It’s amazing and I will take the time to enjoy it until the very end.

 

 

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