Feeling a little left out at work.  That sounds so silly. I’m a grown up – not a middle school girl.  This company is growing. But I’m not. And that is my choice. So I will not be asked to do the sexy assignments. I will not be asked to travel. I miss those things. On the surface. They are fun for a short while. Then they get old and wear thin. I’m still contributing here. Just in a smaller capacity. I’m glad to have this job. The business and the people are great. We do good things here. But I find the work so uninteresting at times. I bring a small income to my family and for that I feel good.

What else makes me feel good? Well, giving back. We had a coat drive her at work. I brought in 4 coats that had not been used in a few years. I hope they will help someone stay warm on cold winter days like this one. Helping someone with a kind word or smile. Parenting my kids. Now that’s is a great job. Not great every day. But the great days by far outweigh the crappy ones.

My mind wanders. H and I had sex this morning. He had been away all week and was ready to implode. It was nice to be skin to skin with him. Of course I mentally had L in the room with us. Which takes me away from H. But hey, I’m human. We all fantasize. I just had my yearly exam with my gyn. We were talking sex. He said the most important organ for sex is not the clitoris but the mind. I know that. I’ve known that for a long long time. I want H and I to be of one mind when it comes to sex. We will be one day. But probably not until I tell L to leave my mind for good.     

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